Family sitting in hammockIt happens every year.  Summer ends too soon.

One day we are helping our children give gifts to their teachers and the next we are thinking about back-to-school shopping.

Wasn’t it yesterday that our children tearfully waved goodbye to their friends – soon to be separated by camp, family vacations and summer school?

The farewells – laced with a level of drama reminiscent of Sophie’s Choice, are too quickly replaced by anxious anticipation of the school year ahead.

And we start pushing on the brakes as we see summer nearing an end – hoping that we can just make it last.  And why not?

What is summer anyway?

Yes of course it is a time of year that includes warmer weather for most, fun opportunities for some and a break from the school routine for all.  But it seems that “summer” is so much more than that.

Summer is a state of mind – a balmy breeze of relaxation that comes over us like high tide.  It’s all the memories we have of summers past mixed together in a lovely cool drink with a colorful paper umbrella sticking out of it.

Why would we ever want it to end?

Just because the kids go back to school in August, doesn’t mean we can’t linger on our own private beach for a bit longer.  If summer is a state of mind, we can stay here as long as we enjoy the sun on our back and the sand between our toes.  In fact, if summer is truly a state of mind, we are in charge.

We can choose to maintain the kind of ease we experience during summer.  We don’t have to succumb to the pressure that surrounds us to be stressed out because after school activities are ramping-up or homework is due.

Think of all the details you handle in summer.

Different camps every week, vacation logistics, entertaining children who are home from school and finding a place for them to be while you are at work.  In some ways, you’re juggling more than you do during the school year.  And yet, summer feels more relaxed.  Why is that?

Perhaps we are more powerful than we think?  What if we could help ourselves hold on to experiences we enjoy and let go of those that don’t serve us?  Now that would be a fine trick, indeed!

Let’s get out our pixie dust and see if we can work a bit of magic here.

Coach Me Quick Tips for Holding On To the Summer State of Mind:

1.  Can we talk?  Notice the conversations you begin to have when school is about to start.  Your well-meaning friends may fall into a habit of complaining about the impending stress. See if you can separate yourself from that conversation.  Make sure that your contributions to any conversation support an easy stress-free transition back to school.

2.  What is it, really?  What do you enjoy in summer?  Maybe its the fun activities or the expansion of time?  Whatever it is, incorporate more of that into your life all year long.  Why save the good stuff for summer?

3.  Often the stress we feel comes in the form of “I have to.”  When you notice yourself being inundated with “have-to’s,” change the way you talk to yourself.  Changing a “have-to,” to a “get-to” may sound silly, but try it and find out what a difference it makes.  “I have to make my kids lunches” makes me feel overwhelmed and unappreciated.  “I get to make my kids lunches” reminds me of how lucky I am to be their mom.  Where can you make that switch?

4.  The silver lining.  What are the positives of summer ending?  When we focus too much on what we don’t want, we may miss all that we do want.

We all have the power to change in every moment – now that’s magic!

“Getting-to” go back to school shopping in L.A.,

Jamee