Little Miss Perfect Goes Off the Rails

Sam Chua via Compfight

Do you enjoy drama?  Are you someone who thrives on intrigue?

Or, are you someone who holds it all together and responds calmly when all around you are falling apart?

As a working mom, you certainly have your share of invitations to drama.

There is always intrigue at the office, and gossip on the school yard.  It’s easy to get involved, embroiled, engulfed and downright swallowed up by drama if we choose to.

And frankly, every once in awhile it is a seductive option… an opportunity to be amazed, enthralled or aghast at something or someone in our world.

But realistically, who has time, right?

For the most part – about 95% of the time – you send your regrets when you receive invites to the drama in your world.

You let it roll off your shoulders.  You smile and shrug.  You look at the bright side.  You offer good advice.  You give hugs and comfort.

But what about that other 5% lurking in the background?  That’s the sultry stranger that can be too hard to resist if our resistance is down.

Have you ever over-reacted and felt out of control? 

You may have been angry, sad, frustrated or confused.

You may have said something you didn’t mean in the heat of the moment.

You may have made assumptions that turned out to be wrong.

And then there is the aftermath. 

Not only do we have to make amends to other people in some cases, but mostly we have to find a way to forgive ourselves.

We may feel embarrassed or hurt or confused by our own inability to “keep it together.”  After all, this is what people expect of us.  And this is what we expect of ourselves.

As hard as it is, this is the best time to ask ourselves what we can learn.

Maybe we learn humility – after all, we are human just like everyone else.

Maybe we learn to be gentler with ourselves – after all, sometimes the standards we hold ourselves to – are too high?

Maybe we learn greater understanding for the people who have delved into their murky 5% in our presence?

If we are going to go “off the rails” every now and again, let’s at least learn a little something that might help us the next time we feel ourselves lurching toward that 5%.

Coach Me Quick Tips for Accepting The 5%:

1.  When are you most vulnerable to your 5%?  Knowing that, how can you intervene to give yourself more support during those times?

2.  What did you learn the last time you felt you did not react or act in a way that meets your expectations for yourself?

3.  How can you be more empathetic towards others when they are experiencing their 5%?

4.  What can you do to help yourself accept all 100% of you – on and off the rails?

Accepting the 5% in L.A.,

 Jamee