Humans struggle. We fret. We worry. But do we have to suffer through each and every struggle?
Could we instead be energized and enriched by the mountains we have to climb? Could we even get excited about the obstacles in our way? Could we be grateful?
As a human who struggles in my own life and also works with people as they face their own challenges, I often wonder if struggling has to equal suffering?
Or, could we make some choices that could lead to empowerment, inspiration and hopefulness as we face the seismic shifts in our lives?
What if we were able to see struggle as a process instead of a problem? And what would need to change inside us to create this shift in perspective?
As a coach, I ask questions and so I wonder – could a few well thought out questions help shift this perspective? What if as a society we viewed struggle as a process? How would our focus be different? What questions would we be asking ourselves and others?
Rather than focusing on suffering, we might ask ourselves where this struggle is leading. We might explore whether or not there could be an exciting outcome or benefit on the other side of the struggle. We could wonder aloud which of our tools is being strengthened and how we may use those stronger tools in the future. We might look for something to be grateful for – amidst the challenges.
There will still at times, be suffering, sadness, loss and grieving. All of these are to be respected and acknowledged. But can we also include a conversation about possibility as a key part of any struggle that leads to something new and different? Can we ask ourselves questions that highlight the opportunities that may be in store for us?
Coach Me Quick Tips for seeing Struggle as a Process:
- Notice when you are in the midst of a struggle – if you are assuming you have to suffer.
- Ask yourself where the growth opportunity is for you.
- Set an intention for yourself that is exciting – what do you want to come out of this process with that will benefit you?
- Enlist a partner who can help you to come up with questions that focus on seeing your struggle as a process.
- After the struggle, acknowledge your growth and the opportunity afforded by that struggle. Thank yourself for your willingness to persevere.
Remember that struggle ends. Wring all the growth you can out of it and then relax into the bliss of non-struggle.
Shifting from problem to process (when I remember!) in L.A.,