I know you. You’re the woman who is “giving 110%” and not settling for “good enough.”
Some may call you an “A type” personality. Others may call you a perfectionist. Whatever they call you – they are definitely calling you when it is time to get something done right. (In fact, I’m getting a little drowsy just thinking about all you do.)
And you say yes MOST of the time. So, you are one busy woman! But that’s o.k. because you know they chose you for a reason: If you want something done right and on time, you give it to a busy person. And, it feels good to be that woman – the woman people call upon, count on and trust. (Is it nap time yet?)
And there are lots of benefits!
You receive your share of well-deserved admiration. In fact, people just don’t know how you do it! You set a great example by being a person who can be counted upon to come through, complete projects and make decisions. You may not know it – but I’m guessing you even have a few secret fans! (Maybe they could pick up some of the slack for once?)
But what if you could have all of that – by doing 80% instead of 110%?
What if you could save that extra 30% (10% of which isn’t really an option for those of us here on Earth) and give it to yourself? What if projects still got completed, children still got fed and dressed and you still were acknowledged for your contribution – but also had energy and time left over for you?
Why do we think that 80% isn’t good enough?
Somehow if we give 80% something will slip through the cracks. Maybe we will be blamed if it doesn’t go well? Maybe we will lose some of that respect and admiration that keeps us going and going… and going? (You are a little crazy, you know.. just sayin’)
Have you noticed that things slip through the cracks even when you do give 110%? And have you noticed that at times you are blamed for things, misunderstood and left feeling that your efforts are not appreciated? It’s not fun – but it’s even less fun when you have been giving 110%.
Ready for a shift?
80% is a B. That is still above average – so even at 80%, you are no slacker. If someone says you are doing “B work,” you can say “thank you very much my friend!” and gracefully turn on your heel and head off to finish your mojito.
In fact, with a solid B, you will still be asked to lead, organize, create and advise. You will still have lots of opportunities to say yes. And, lots of opportunities to say no. And it is in that choice, that you will find more time to enjoy your life and take care of you.
So should you ever give 110%? Absolutely! And you get to choose where you want to put that extra effort.
If you are in charge of throwing a Birthday party for your boss – 80% is probably fine if you have a great team. If your child is struggling and needs you – it’s time to pull 110% out of your tool box. Hoping to get that coveted promotion? 110% time. Making cookies for the school bake sale? 80% cookies are delicious.
Coach Me Quick Tips for Giving 80%:
1. Take a moment right now and jot down your primary tasks for today. Just give 80% here. You don’t have to list every task and it doesn’t have to be in any particular order. Just write it as you think it. Take a look. Which of those items require 110%? The rest is 80%.
2. Now take 1 of those 80% items and write down how you will approach that task with an 80% mindset. Will you take less time? Will you do less research? If you are looking for a good orthodontist, do you need 4 referrals or will one solid referral from a friend you trust do the trick?
3. Notice where you pressure yourself every day. Do you insist upon making home cooked dinners every night? Do you need to double check everything your assistant is handling? Do you have to check your email right before bed and the minute you wake up? Where do you feel a habitual pressure and where can you open the valve and let some of the steam out?
4. Now take one more look at that list. Are there items on the list that you don’t want to do or don’t think you need to do – but you feel you “should” do? Ask yourself why. If the answer has to do with what someone else will think – either 80% that task or cross it off completely.
Remember that 80% is a B. That is still above average. And you are so much more than what and how you do do do…
Giving 80% in L.A.
Jamee
Photo credit: Leo Reynolds via Compfight
I read this after intentionally missing my son’s YMCA basketball practice. Not only would I make sure that I was at every game and brought snacks when asked, etc., but I made a point to be at every single mind numbing practice, too. This time, I decided- no more. He has a step-father, father, and grandfather who are more than willing to go to the practices while I just enjoy the games. I greatly enjoyed this article, and I will be sharing it.
Dear Nicole,
Thank you for your comments – you are right step father, father and grandfather can all do their share!